[Groop]Please help Little Billy Evans

[Chris Schechner]

I would usually not forward this type of story, but this one REALLY is
different...
A touching true story: Please help little Billy Evans.
My name is Billy Evans. I am a very sick little boy.   My mother is typing
this for me, because I can't. She is crying. The reason she is so sad is
because I'm so sick. I was born without a body.  It doesn't hurt, except
when I try to breathe. The doctors gave me an artificial body. It is a
burlap bag filled with leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could
do on account of us having no money or insurance. I would like to have a
body transplant, but we need more money.
Mommy doesn't work because she said nobody hires crying people. I said,
"Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my burlap bag. Mommy always gives me
hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap and it makes her sneeze and
chafes her real bad.
I hope you will help me. You can help me if you forward this email to
everyone you know. Forward it to people you don't know, too. Dr. Johansen
said that for every person you forward this email to, Bill Gates will team
up with AOL and send a nickel to NASA. With that  funding, NASA will collect
prayers from school children all over America and have the astronauts take
them up into space so that the angels can hear them better.  Then they will
come back to earth and go to the Pope, and he will take up a collection in
church and send all the money to the doctors. The doctors could help me get
better then.  Remember, every time you forward this letter, the astronauts
can take more prayers to the angels and my dream will be closer to coming
true.
Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball.  Right now I can only be
third base.
Please help me. Mommy is so sad, and I want a body. I don't want my leaves
to rot before I turn ten. If you don't forward this email, that's okay.
Mommy says you're a mean and heartless nasty person who doesn't care about a
poor little boy with only a head. She says that if you don't stew in the raw
pit of your own guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die a long slow horrible
death.  What kind of cruel person are you that you can't take five minutes
to forward this to all your friends so that they can feel guilt and shame
about ignoring a poor, bodiless nine-year-old boy?
Please help me. I try to be happy, but it's hard.
I wish I had a kitty.  I wish I could hold a kitty. I wish I could hold a
kitty that wouldn't chew on me and try to bury its poo in the leaves of my
burlap body. I wish that very much.
Thank You, Billy "Smiley" Evans