[Groop] Slightly funny story

[Tone]

	I have been debating on telling you guys a somewhat humorous
occurrence, which did in fact happen to me. This is a bit long, so read
it at your discretion/leisure. I just hope no one criticizes me for
posting an unnecessary e-mail as some tactic in the competition for top
2007 poster.

	The day after getting married my new WIFE (that still sounds odd
to me) and I were going to take a train up to our honeymoon. I had
already paid the bed and breakfast where we would be staying in advance
and in full. We just had to arrive and check in then enjoy ourselves.
Anyway, we slept in that morning and somewhat rushed ourselves to leave
sooner than later in order to make an earlier train. We ideally wanted
to check in at the earliest allowed time slot, so we could naturally get
"settled in" as soon as possible.
	We were out the door and not even halfway down our block when I
realized my wedding band was missing! Not even twenty four hours had
passed since I had the ring put on my finger by my wife during the
ceremony, and it was gone! I flipped out quite a bit. It was raining and
overcast, but we both searched the sidewalk and gutter, etc... twice. I
knew I had the ring on my finger when I was washing my hands in the
bathroom earlier, so it had to be within our apartment's immediate
vicinity. I distinctly remembered imagining the soap getting on the ring
and making it slippery, so I had given extra thought to making sure it
would have no chance of slipping off my hand and down the drain or be
pulled off when drying my hands with the towel.
	My wife and I were going nuts looking for it. I back-tracked
every step I had taken during that morning probably three times and
checked everything twice. My wife also checked various places herself.
We each emptied out my pockets and baggage to see if the ring might have
been brushed off while packing, etc. All of this was to no avail. I was
on the verge of tears. Meanwhile my wife was not as upset as me or mad
at me at all. As another hour passed we were getting no where and she
was getting bummed that I was bummed and just wanted us to try and enjoy
the honeymoon we had planned (minus an hour or two of course).
	Early in our relationship my then girlfriend had given me a
cheesy metallic band with the word "DESIRE" engraved in it. I never wore
jewelry and it was not really meant to be worn as such, so I had always
just kept it on my keychain and liked noticing it from time to time when
working, etc. Well, that Desire band happens to be my ring size, and I
did not want to check in to a Bed and Breakfast for our honeymoon
without some kind of ring, so my wife suggested I wear it until we got
back and could find my actual wedding band.
	I put on that Desire band and we left for our honeymoon. I was
of course down-and-out and not the peppy newly-wed I should have been.
What sucked even more, but is kind of funny in retrospect, is the crappy
Desire band shed a dark thick line on the skin of my finger. I think it
was either caused from some kind of oxidation/reaction between the
low-quality metal with the acids on my skin, and/or possibly
dirt/pollution, which had been imbedded on the inside of the ring from
biking around New York City for the past two years. Either way by the
time we checked into the Bed and Breakfast, one-third of my ring finger
looked like someone had solidly tinted my finger with a pencil or
charcoal. I had not even noticed the black on my finger until I handed
the credit card I had reserved the room with to the inn-keeper. I just
hope she did not notice.
	Once we were in the room I basically just wanted to strip down,
but not for the reasons one would naturally think about during the
course of a honeymoon. Even though my wife and I had checked our bags
and my pockets I first wanted to systematically scan every inch of our
stuff. If anything, I had a suspicion my ring had perhaps slipped off
from the friction of packing our things. I wanted to be absolutely
certain there was no chance the ring would pop out of our luggage when
we unpacked in the room because if we did not notice it then and there,
we would never find it.
	So, I began to take off my clothing. All the while I checked
every pocket once again as I removed each article of clothing. Sure
enough just after I undid my belt, unbuttoned my waist band, unzipped my
fly, and slid my hands into every pocket in my slacks before removing
them any further... I found my wedding ring in one of my back pockets!
	That might sound like a very obvious place for it to have been,
but you have to understand WE CHECKED it. I could have sworn before we
had left at some point I slid my hand into that very same pocket and
made sure to feel the inside corners. I believe my wife did the same. I
KNOW my wife dug her hands into my front pockets! I also know my wife
patted my butt too! Of course besides her feeling me up to check if the
ring was in one of my pockets, she most assuredly wanted to pat my
bottom for other reasons. The pants I was wearing were ones she liked in
particular for the way they "fit" me. :) I think the ring must have been
tucked in that pocket right at the curve of my cyclist-butt because she
sure as heck did not notice the ring through the fabric. :)
	The only thing I can think of is that the left back pocket the
ring was in is a pocket I NEVER use on any of my pants for any purpose.
If anything, I only ever use my back RIGHT pocket to stash my keys. God
forbid I put something significant enough into either of my rear pockets
and ruin the sight of my tight cyclist-butt. ;) LOL
	I think the ring must have slipped off when I slid my hand in
that pocket only to straighten out the bunched-up pocket lining.
Otherwise there is no reason. I believe my ring to be the right size for
me. However my knuckle is the widest part of my finger, so the wedding
band wiggles a bit once it is on. I also know skin/fingers can swell up
or contract at varying times, so perhaps at the "right" moment and under
certain conditions (like tight pockets) I am going to have to be extra
careful. What is an ongoing amusement to this story is right now I have
a little strip of transparent twisty-tie tightly wrapped around one edge
of my wedding ring as an extra precaution. I know it is pretty cheesy,
but it is hardly noticeable and I do not want to take ANY chances of
loosing my wedding band, AGAIN. :)
_TONE_