[Groop] Groo Holiday Game

Rocky Smith mulch3 at hotmail.com
Thu Dec 17 08:27:59 PST 2009

Greetings fellow Groopers and Groopies!

My answers below, in bold:

1.  Which character from the world of Groo (other than Groo) would you most like to have over for Holiday Dinner and why?  At first, I thought Chakaal (because I imagine courageous, sword-wielding women such as Eowyn, Joan of Arc and Anne Bonny to be exceptional conversationalists).  Ulitmately, however, I decided to go with Weaver and Scribe (because I too, eke out my living as a storyteller).  
2.  What ideal gift, if you were Santa in Groo's world, would you leave under your character's tree this year? (the character mentioned above).  An elaborate set of quill pens and a journal of parchment bound in leather.
3.  How many of Santa's elves do you think Groo would accidentally slay if he wandered up to the North Pole?  He'd very nearly slay the first three he encountered.  After that, word would get around  . . .
4.  How many penquins do you think Groo and Rufferto might roast if they wandered up to the North Pole?  Two.
5.  If you made a Groo snowman, which vegetable would you use for his nose?  A gourd (my wife voted 'sweet potato').
6.  If Groo crashed Grooella's Christmas Masked Ball, which of the following foods would he name his second favorite (behind cheese dip of course):  c.  Mince Pies because I think he'd be fascinated by them.  Just think!  A whole new running gag!  ("Mince pies?")
7.  What yuletide favorite would the Minstrel most likely sing/play first?  He'd put to rhyme (again) T'WAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS.
8.  Which of the following classic Christmas grouches would last the longest in a duel against Groo?  f.  Lucy Van Pelt, primarily because I don't believe Groo would at first feel endangered by a child (at least not until said child humiliates him like she does to Charlie Brown).
9.  Which Groo character (including Groo) would you most like to meet under the mistletoe?  Arba.
10.  Which three (3) GROO characters would top Santa's 'naughty' list?  Since I can't remember which of the tyrant kings Groo has slain and which he hasn't, I'll go with Taranto, Pal and Grativo.
11.  Which three (3) GROO characters would you most like to go sledding with?  Mulch and two of the Witch of Kaan's monkey-like minions.
12.  Which GROO character, besides Groo and Rufferto, would you most like to see made into an ornament?  The Witch of Kaan, stooping alongside a couple of her Orangutans . . .
13.  What 'secret santa' gift would you buy for the following Groo characters:

a.  Dakarba:  A non-stick iron cauldron
b.  Rufferto:  A new collar (expressly for adventuring)
c.  The Witch of Kaan:  A 'spare' glass eye
d.  Arcadio:  A scented salve - not unlike aftershave - to smooth upon his generous chin
e.  Captain Ahax:  A cask of tar (to be used as caulk for repairing his ship(s))

14.  Name the three (3) GROO characters most likely to go caroling . . .  'lil Groo, Minstrel, 'lil Grooella
15.  Which three (3) GROO characters would top Santa's 'nice' list?  Ambassador Gru, Rufferto, The Sage
16.  If Groo and Rufferto were attacked by an army of mutant gingerbread men, would they slay first then eat, or nibble first and slay second?  Groo would charge in, hacking and slashing, then discover they taste good.  Upon loudly proclaiming this, Rufferto (having attacked first with his teeth) would say: "Groo!  I told you that!"
17.  Assuming the Sage were Santa, who would make the best mall santa - Grativo, Drumm or Granny Groo?  Drumm.  And Pal would sell overpriced photos of your children with 'Santa'.
18.  What do you suppose was 'lil Groo's first ever gift?  A toy ship from his mother (which he'd promptly sink).
19.  Which is emptier, Groo's head or Pal's stocking?  Groo's head (Pal's stocking would at least have coal in it).
20.  If Groo stowed away in Santa's sleigh sans Rufferto, would the vehicle crash/sink/burn or would Santa's magic be strong enough to counteract the bad luck effect?  Santa's sleigh is kindling.  It might not go down until a third of the way into his journey but go down it will.  Not even Santa is safe from Groo . . .

Happy Holidays to everyone and best wishes for a healthy season!

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